Are you doubting yourself as of late? Maybe you’re missing your usual ‘can-do’ attitude. Or, do you feel like you’ve lost your ‘touch’ or you just don’t feel like you’re succeeding at anything you do?
We all have times when we lose our ‘sparkle’. Maybe you've suffered from a personal crisis or experienced a career setback, leaving your confidence dented just when you need it the most. It’s a terrible feeling – you start to doubt and question yourself, and you end up wondering, “Will I ever get my sparkle back?”
To get some deeper insight into this, I spoke with Ashley Speers. Today, Ashley is a successful female inclusion and diversity champion, an executive officer for CEOs for Gender Equity, a PhD student, and a mum to 2 wonderful young boys. But, even with all of that, Ashley has suffered her own share of setbacks and personal challenges, which, over time, dimmed her sparkle.
So, how did she go about helping herself move forward and get back into the driver's seat of her life?
Read on to find out (or you can listen to our full interview over at the podcast)!
4 Tips to Regain Your Sparkle
Small, but consistent changes are often the things that yield us the biggest results. Yet, far too often they are the things we neglect and ignore, often making us feel isolated and alone. So, here are four tips from Ashley on how she moved through one of the most challenging periods of her life.
Take a step back and reflect.
According to Ashley, the first important step to regaining your sparkle is to take a step back. Take a step back away from screens and away from the hustle and bustle of your everyday life. Look for somewhere quiet – be it at home or out in nature – where you can sit down and reflect. Ask yourself - Where are you at right now? How do you feel? What areas of your life, whether it be relationships, friends, parenthood, study or work - which are you not comfortable or happy with currently? When you feel like you’re starting to lose yourself, it’s important that you go on a bit of a journey of self-reflection and be honest with yourself.
Open up about it.
Yes, you might be a strong and independent person – but remember that you don’t always have to carry everything on your own. It’s okay to ask for help; it doesn’t make you ‘weak’, it simply means you’re human. So, if you’re ever feeling down, open up about it. Be vulnerable. Engage with a good friend and talk to them – exploring how you’re feeling and getting it all out of your head can make the world of difference to then getting clarity on what you need to do next. Opening up to someone – and getting another perspective – can also help you remember who you really are, and it can remind you that the most successful and most accomplished people need the assistance and support of others.
Do your research, plan accordingly, and take the appropriate steps.
Do your research and identify your options. What can you change about your situation? For instance, if you feel like your work is ‘draining’ you, it may be time for you to consider a different career path or job role (see our latest blog about that HERE!). Really think about your situation and plan what you can do about it. Still feeling stuck? Going back to the previous point, consider opening up to others and get more support or perspective from those who know you well.
Once you have a better handle on your situation and have come up with a concrete plan to deal with it, take the first step and systematically work your way through. Small, but consistent steps are key here.
Bonus Tip: Exercise.
When you’re in survival mode, exercising might be the last thing you want to think about. But, it is very important to your overall physical, mental and emotional health and resilience, and it is something you should always make time for. As Ashley shares, “Exercise was a big part of the physical and mental journey to help me get through.”
The Bottom Line
Losing your spark doesn’t mean the end of the world. You CAN regain it with some positive life changes. But, just remember: Be kind to yourself – take your time and do what you need to do, but also back yourself along the way for being brave enough to change your situation!
Need help reigniting your sparkle at work? Book a call with me here and let’s talk.
About Ashley Speers
Ashley is a female inclusion and diversity champion who is over the talk and all about the action to address gender equity. Ashley is a mum of two young boys and is working on her PhD which aims to provide a framework for success to improve female inclusion and diversity in the workplace. Ashley is also the Executive Officer for CEOs for Gender Equity, an organisation that believes that gender equality is not about fixing women, nor is it about fixing men; it is about fixing workplaces.
Listen to my full conversation with Ashley Speers here.
